Ava starts Kindergarten

‘She’ll be off to school one day… and the days like this will be days gone by’….
This is one of the thoughts that has motivated many of my choices in motherhood. The choice to finish work two weeks before her birth & make no hurried plans to return to work away from home. It was the thought behind the adjustments and sacrifices it took for me to do that. It was a thought that helped me find patience when she sometimes screamed all night as a new baby. It was a thought when during the day, she would fall asleep in my arms & although I wanted to put her down & get a cup of tea, I often just held her for her entire sleep & looked at her face….

‘She’ll be off to school one day… and the days like this will be days gone by’….

It was one of my thoughts… when my arms were tired, carrying her home from the park while I was pushing the stroller & the shopping home too, because she liked to be up closer to me. It was a thought when she asked me to play dolls house & I played even though I didn’t always find it fun…. and when I took her to play group and brought home paintings to write the date on them and put them on the fridge… and when I blew out the candles on the many play dough cakes she made me…. and went searching through the house for her in her favourite game of hide & seek…

‘She’ll be off to school one day… and the days like this will be days gone by’….

It was the thought when I played with her instead of doing the housework….. and spent lunch times on picnic blankets in the yard… and invited friends over to play….. and made a mess with the paints…. and let the days unfold in whatever way they did … It was the thought when I made myself say ‘OK’ when I sometimes wanted to say ‘not now’…

We each navigate motherhood & create family life in our own individual ways. I learned early on when I was breaking all the rules of my ‘how to’ baby books, when I was rocking my baby to sleep to music & feeding her by instinct rather than by the clock, that the rules were not for me. I have journeyed through my first five years of motherhood, not by following books, but by following my heart. My heart said ‘be gentle’, ‘this is temporary’, ‘cherish this’, ‘allow the joy’, ‘keep going’.. especially knowing that ‘she will go to school one day’. I wanted to walk her through the school gates feeling I had spent my time with her well. For me, spending it well, meant nothing in particular other than spending it with her…

This week it happened. She went to school. She was ready… she was excited…. she was brave…. and I was proud. I packed her lunch & I thought of all the days I had watched her ‘play schools’. She would rummage through the kitchen cupboard looking for a lunch box & pack it into a back pack… “mum you be the teacher & let’s pretend I am going to school”. During the game, she would call me ‘miss Lisa’.

On her first morning, the sun was shining. When she had her uniform on she said “mum is school real?”. I knew what she meant. She had played schools, seen it in cartoons and in stories. She was finding it hard to believe the time had come for her to really go to school…

Walking her to school felt like walking her into a day that seemed so far away five years ago. She looked ready to take on whatever waited for her in this new adventure…

I hope it’s a journey filled with friendships…

There were no tears from me until she had walked away with her class. I peeked into her classroom & it was easier to walk away after seeing she was relaxed and smiling…

I’m glad I had Pete & Anouk to walk away with me…

We have many more full days to spend with this little one…

Anouk rocked day one of school pick up in her super girl costume. She’s in training to be the embarrassing little sister I think 😉

If the rest of the year is as smooth as week one, then kindergarten will be a very good year in Ava’s life. Another year to cherish…